Penis Blog

Football player Onterrio Smith had trouble getting his penis through airport security. Not the attached one, the whizzinator one.

It must have been embarrassing for Onterrio Smith, the Minnesota Vikings' part-time running back and full-time substance abuser, to have airport security people find a plastic penis and bags of dehydrated urine in his luggage.

Hey, I blush when the airport security people examine my electric nose- hair trimmer. I never want to be asked, "Sir, is this your penis?"

In Smith's carry-on bag, inspectors found a Whizzinator kit, which includes bags of powdered pee and the ersatz male genitalia designed to fool drug testers.