Penis Blog

Anyway, one part of the joke is this; China’s most expensive delicacies is eating wild animal’s penis! So they claim that by eating those wild animal penis such as tiger’s which can help to prolong erection. Also they claim that the harder you find the animal the more powerful is the effect after consuming those animal’s penis. Mike Hui said, there’s one animal which is most difficult to find, Bin Laden! So if he’s being found, for sure by eating his penis will make your erection last longer and more powerful than any other wild animal’s penis you consumed in the world! This part I laugh until cough!

You wouldn't think that there would be much call for this sort of thing, as elephants are prized and endangered, but in some game preserves they are - or were at the time this article took place - overpopulated and running amok. Apparently this was in the early days of elephant castration, where techniques were still being perfected and breakthroughs had yet to be made. And this was made all the more difficult by the fact that an elephant's testicles are inside the abdomen.

I know it’s a cliché, but China really does have the most outrageous food selections imaginable. An as example, let’s look at their fantastic variety of cooked animal penis:

One of the worst bushtucker trials ever saw Carol Thatcher and Jilly Goolden chowing down on kangaroos' willies.

The penis is about five feet long when flaccid. "I've never seen one erect and I hope I never will," jokes O'Shea, who has been trying to capture a live giant squid for nearly a decade.

The end of the penis has a cartilaginous lance, he says, the better for stabbing. He pauses. Talking about this too much, he says, can get you labeled as some kind of pervert.

Ed Helms kicks things off by reporting from the Bronx Zoo in New York. He speaks to Evo-gelist Dan Wharton about the possibility of man's descent from apes. Well, most importantly, who has the bigger penis? Helms is happy to hear that the human penis is larger.

You can buy just about anything here, from a penis gourd for a few dollars to orator stools for a few thousand dollars with certificates of authenticity and export permits from the National Museum.

According to The Sun, the juice was tested it on male rabbits and it was found that it boosted blood flow to the penis, helping them rise to the occasion. It also fights cancer-causing molecules and beats heart disease.

A wild elephant whose penis was injured by a tree branch is being treated by His Majesty the King's veterinary surgeon, it emerged today.

The veterinarian, Dr. Alongkorn Mahanop, travelled to Sri Racha district in the country's eastern province of Chonburi today to treat Phlai Thong Bai, a 32 year-old elephant whose mahout had taken him to Laemchabang to search for food.

There's only so much bull's penis a man can eat in a lifetime. So after years of travelling the world with a camera crew in tow, Michael Palin says it's time to put up his feet and stay home.

"That's it... I'm too old now for these big series," Palin -- the host of such epic television travel series as "Pole to Pole," "Sahara" and most recently "Himalaya" -- told the Sunday Times newspaper.

As the horses are positioned on the starting line, the dealings and double-crosses continue between the jockeys. We are witnessing the age-old sport of political deception. Nine horses line themselves up, while the 10th starts from behind and gets a running start as the rope falls. They're off! Ten powerful horses, careening around the track at breakneck speed as the crowd roars. A year-long wait of hope and preparation is about to be reduced to 90 seconds of blood and courage.

Because the track is shaped like a shell, there are two very sharp, very tight turns to each lap. These are the areas of greatest danger as the horses, if they make their approach too fast to properly negotiate the turn, will crash headlong into the padded walls. Many a horse and jockey have lost their lives here. Desperately holding onto the reins with one hand, the jockeys hold a traditional whip, made from a stretched calf penis, in the other. This whip is used just as often on the other jockeys as on the horse.

"Poaching is an underground criminal activity that is simply not addressed in our tiger reserves in India," she said.

The main reason, it is believed, is the high price to be gained from the use of tiger parts in traditional Chinese medicine.

The head, skin, claws, meat, blood and penis all command high prices. A whole body, ground down and separated into various medicines, could in total command around $50,000.

Overseas, Jamster even boasted a �10 million profit by early February for a ringtone featuring a frog making an annoying noise. The company called it "the most successful ringtone in the world" by late January, and a dance mix was played on UK radio. Despite this overwhelming appeal and success, 60 people complained about the ad.

The point of contest was that said frog happens to be wearing a leather vest and goggles while riding an invisible motorcycle. You can also see his penis, and he is blue.

According to the UK's Advertising Standards Authority, "While unusual for an animated model of this type to be shown with genitalia, no sexual or inappropriate references were made about its anatomy." The blue frog's penis held out under the glaring eye of mother Britain's decency standard.

The Icelandic Phallological Museum contains a collection of over one hundred penises and penile parts belonging to almost all the land and sea mammals that can be found in Iceland.

Visitors to the museum will encounter thirty specimens belonging to twelve different kinds of whale, one specimen taken from a rogue polar bear, eighteen specimens belonging to seven different kinds of seal and walrus, and fifty one specimens originating from sixteen different kinds of land mammal: all in all, a total of one hundred specimens belonging to thirty six different kinds of mammal.

It should be noted that the museum has also been fortunate enough to receive a legally-certified gift token for a future specimen belonging to Homo Sapiens.

Trade in dead tigers is illegal, but a single one can fetch up to $50,000 on the international market. Organs and body parts are popular in Chinese medicine. Bones are worth about $400 a kilogram, a penis almost $850, a tooth $120 and a claw just $10.

A century ago, there were an estimated 40,000 tigers in India. Now, some wildlife experts say there are barely 2,000 and the official government census about 3,700.

Clissold was hired by "Pat," a Wall Street banker, to establish joint ventures with Chinese companies. The search for investment projects took Clissold all over the country, to more than 100 dilapidated factories.

One visit included a hilarious trip to a condom factory with some straight-laced Morgan Stanley fund managers. To cultivate relationships, he attended dinners where he ate such foods as deer penis and drank the inescapable, gut-wrenching baijiu, an alcohol concoction.

Most marsupials, except for the two largest species of kangaroos, have a bifurcated penis. That is, it separates into two separate columns, and so the penis terminates in two ends. The dolphin has prehensile control over his penis, so he sometimes uses it as an sensory appendage with which to probe the ocean floor. The barnacle has the longest penis for its own length: up to twenty times the length of the animal.

In September 2001, the scientific journal Nature published a picture of a small duck with a penis longer than its body. What the Argentinian lake duck Oxyura vittata uses this extraordinary appendage for is a mystery, but we can make some informed guesses.

In almost every instance of extreme genitalia, in males and females, the explanation lies in sexual conflict. In most animals, females typically mate with several males during each sexual cycle. Species where females do this are said to be 'polyandrous', and the consequence of multiple sexual partners is sperm competition - the competition between the sperm of the different partners to fertilise the female's eggs. It may benefit a female to be polyandrous, but it doesn't pay males to allow their partner to be fertilised by someone else's sperm - hence the conflict.

A half-billion year old fossil has been discovered with its penis intact.

The five millimetre long crustacean, discovered by UK and US researchers, has been named Colymbosathon ecplecticos - derived from the Greek for “astounding swimmer with a large penis".

Male giant squid have been found to have a long, muscular penis, which is unusual as the males of most other squid species use an arm to pass sperm packets from themselves to the female.

Scientists believe that the male squid literally injects his sperm into the female's skin during mating.

"The two of them mount beak to beak, so you've got arms and tentacles flying everywhere," Dr O'Shea said.

"The male is co-ordinating this enormous penis, and he's implanting spermadaphores into the female's arms.

Giant squid caught in Scotland Some giant squid have occasionally been caught by fishermen "He uses the penis like a plunger or a huge hypodermic needle, and he's physically stabbing the female's arms."

If you're looking for that one-of-a-kind Valentine's day gift, here it is. And you might even get lucky.

Back in October, 1995, Jim Hudnall posed a question in alt.lucky.w about raccoon penis bones. He said that Mick Jagger's partner Jeri Hall had mentioned in an interview that when she was growing up in Texas, boys gave raccoon penis bones to girls they liked as a form of love token or simple love spell. Jim said he had never heard of penis bones before and wondered if raccoons really had them.

I responded that Jeri Hall was ...

Odd, indeed.

There is startling variation in the character of penises (penes) throughout the animal kingdom. Apart from size variation, already noted, shapes and colouring vary enormously. Insect and reptilian penises are often equipped with spines, corrugations, knobs, hooks, etc., to secure the female once insertion has taken place. If a copulating pair of insects or snakes are forcibly separated then either the male or the female may be irreparably damaged. The genital organs of the male may be torn off ...

Now that we have your attention: imagine how much larger the market for cialis would be if these creatures could buy it.

It is appropriate that large animals should have large genital organs.

The penis of the hippopotamus and elephant can be several feet in length, and uses have some times been found for such weighty organs other than simple reproduction - the pizzle, for instance, formerly used for flogging, was in fact a bull's penis. Marshall's "Physiology of Reproduction" notes that the elephant penis is around 150 cm. in length, a third of which is formed by the pendulous ...